Onward and upwards

Hello big wide world. It's been a long time since I braved this territory, but here I am, making a difficult first step back into the public domain.

Since my last post, I have endured some of the toughest of times of my life. I won't go in to too much detail here for the sake of others involved, but my life has changed dramatically in the past couple of months and I am now a single man for the first time in over twenty years. It's a sorry situation. I'm staying with some incredible friends, who have taken me in, looked after me and made me part of their beautiful little family. I have been blessed with some extraordinary friends, who have rallied round to help me to make the start of the year a much more positive situation that it otherwise might have been.

Here is Alistair, who turned up on New Years Eve, dragged me out of my miserable, inactive stupor and set about motivating an immense transition to the workshop, with the conversion of the earth-floored woodshed, into a proper working space.

With Different Dave managing the project, Marky Mark, Alistair and his friend Pete on the team, we dug and barrowed and dug and barrowed, tonne after tonne of earth and hardcore and concrete over a two week period, mostly in torrential rain. It was great to get busy and to not have to think about making pots, with my inspiration at an all time low. Winter is always a struggle for me, this one particularly.

Here's the outside apron at the front of the workshop, which is usually sticky with mud.

Now replaced with concrete(actually this the back, I've got the picture below where this one should be)

And at last proper drainage, to help prevent the flooding of my kiln shed which has been happening with such regularity after one of the wettest winters on record - oops, that's the picture above.

So here's the new west wing. It still has to have the end wall constructed, with a door and window. The whole building will be insulated and lined out with a stud wall before it's finished, but the earthworks are done and that's the major part of the job. The rest can be completed as and when I have the time and the money. It was an extraordinarily positive beginning to the year, in a dreadfully negative situation. 

As the old cliche goes, it's at times like this, that you find out who your real friends are - and there have been some wonderful people who have been there for me, virtually, physically and metaphorically, to hug me tight when I've cried. As for the others, the ones who have been judgmental, or just don't have the time for me and are notable by their absence - I'm best rid. My true friends love me in spite of everything and to have such folk in my life, makes me a very lucky man 

Trying to make pots has been extremely difficult. I have come very close to giving it all up on a number of occasions. But what else can I do? I hate it with the same energy as I love it. It's the only thing that I'm reasonably good at. It has been a constant struggle to find confidence, motivation and focus and the stress is compounded daily with the number of pressing deadlines. The first is an exhibition in Tokyo in April, which will require a hundred or so pieces. I have about forty of them made, mostly small stuff - lots of jugs of course.

 Some little tapered jugs, these are about 6" tall...

1.5lb baluster jugs

This little jug and will be green when fired. It's about 6" tall. I don't usually make many small pots, I'm much more comfortable with bigger pieces, my hands trace out the forms so much more readily on the wheel.

 These are 3lb jugs

and this a 5lb jug.

3lb jugs, slipped and decorated in a variety of colours.

I've made some jars too - bowls, dishes, teapots, mugs, still to go.

Today I must get busy again. I need to get a positive head on my shoulders and try and lose myself in my work. This could go one way or the the other very easily. Sometimes, a lot of the time in fact, it feels as though there's no reason for making this stuff any more and particularly just right now as I have to find my inspiration from within. I almost threw the towel in yesterday and would have slumped into a deep depression had it not have been for some wise words from a couple of good friends, who gave me a shake and put me back on my feet. So I tidied the workshop up instead, ready to try and make the best pots of my life.

Here comes a new era - onward and upwards.